Ready - Set - CHEER!

Tomorrow is the first day of Cheer Practice for this season, and my first practice as a Coach instead of sitting on the side watching.  I am both nervous and excited.  

I'm nervous about how the Parents will view me.  Will I be judged because of my size?  I know standing out there I will feel that all eyes are on me, and I usually try to avoid any kind of attention on myself.  

But I'm also really excited.  It is something I get to do with my daughter, and I get to be a part of something.  I feel like I'm finally getting off the sidelines and beginning to LIVE my life.  

I have a long way to go, and my eating hasn't improved much.  Still making poor choices at times, and not eating as often as I should.  Most days it is still just once a day, but I'm working on improving that.  I did buy several things of yogurt so that atleast I can eat yogurt for breakfast. 

I didn't buy any ice-cream at the grocery store, or any ingredients to make cookies.  We will be celebrating my oldest daughters 14th birthday this weekend.  I know I will eat cake and ice-cream, but not having it here during the week is a start.  

All in all I am feeling pretty good.  

and that is a rare thing.  It's amazing how much one incident can change my attitude.  I WANT to eat healthier now.  I WANT to get out and "move" more.  I WANT to do everything possible to get the scale to go down instead of up for a change.  

Even my "assertiveness" has changed.  When I got volunteered by a friend ("J") to coach, they had just found out they needed to add another coach because the squad would be split into two teams this year.  "J" and the two other coaches had coached together for 2 years previously and did not want to add another coach.  When they found out they had to, "J" volunteered me.  I think, knowing me, she thought I would just be a silent person to "help" and would not try to come in and make changes, etc.

Because of problems having the squad split was going to cause for competition "J" decided to drop out.  I met with the other two coaches and they both seemed genuinely pleased I was going to be coaching.  They asked if I could take charge of the 3rd grade squad for the games along with another assistant coach.  I agreed to. I was relieved to find that they asked my opinion on things, and listened to what I had to say.  

I was very nervous at first, because I have really never been one to take much initiative with anything.  I have always thought that someday "when I lose weight" it would be something I would like to do.  Since agreeing I have made several suggestions that they all liked and have implemented into the "Plan".   

I am not just a silent partner.  I'm actively involved, and it feels SO GOOD! 

I'm liking this new me so far.